Not my pleasure but yours Lord…..
I need a daily reminder (ok maybe hourly) of how living life with my own pleasures locked in my sights always, always ends up not so pleasurable. I’m left feeling empty, unsafe, exposed, and restless. As a Christ follower I think it is a continual struggle to live in this world of self love, pride, and gratification and extremely hard to stay away from the “do what I want or what pleases me” mentality. I am a planner at heart. It pleases me to make plans and lists of things I need or want to do and how I am going execute them. Not considering at all what God’s plan is. Writing down my hearts desire for today, tomorrow, and down the road. Hearing the approval of people is something that, even as I get older, I can’t shake. The praise of others is a lovely sound to my ears and fills that empty space for a moment. Shortly after the attention, however, I am left alone. Seeking another way to fill that void. What a silly girl I am to think that anything other than God’s perfect attention and affection would be enough to satisfy. This selfish world is filled with empty pleasures. Hollow things that disguise themselves as beautiful, delicious, and meaningful. Once consumed their talons dig deeper into you. Like a serpent wrapped around you, every breath you exhale is an opportunity for it’s grip to tighten. Soon there seems to be no hope to release yourself of that suffocating grasp. It is a choice we face over and over. Close your eyes and give in to whatever it is that has a hold of you or use the power God has given you to break free.
If you could plan out your child’s life for them would you not go over every fine detail? Exhaust yourself with making every single day perfect for them. Fine tune little moments here and there as you see their personalities develop and their interests change. As parents we worry over our children’s futures. We worry over their health, relationships they will have, and if they will fit into this world’s idea of a valuable member of society. If we as flawed parents can wonder and contemplate and even attempt to plan our children’s lives how much more does our Heavenly Father carefully and strategically map out ours. Once you have met Jesus you have the freedom of giving over the steering wheel of your life to a God who loves you more than you can imagine. I find myself confessing my selfish wants and calling upon God to bring me back up out of my own mess. Then I again get to feel the pleasure of knowing I am right where He wants me to be. I am so thankful for a patient and forgiving Savior. Psalm 16:11 (ESV) You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy;at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. I can have so much more pleasure in every moment when I allow God to make the plans and trust Him with my life and the life of my family. Psalm 18:30 (ESV) This God-his way is perfect;the word of the Lord proves true;he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.